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South Detroit, 2004 With the recent stinkfinger reunion, concert goers had reason to celebrate when it was announced that stinkfinger would not be playing anywhere near them. Here is what seems to be a mentally disabled gentleman who must think he got tickets to see Sesame Street on Ice. I imagine he was quite shocked when he saw a guy in a Big Bird outfit take a dump on stage. |
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Understudies What most people don't understand is that the machine that surrounds stinkfinger is hugely dependent on consistant revenue. So if a band member cannot play, as was the case in Korea when Bob got a light-bulb stuck in his urethra, understudies can quickly be called in to fill the position. |
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Tour Kickoff Party What better way to rouse up the troops and get them excited about spending hours away from home touring, than to have a tour kickoff party. Here the stinkfinger roadies drink, relax, shoot stray dogs and show the world what the term 'stinkfinger' really means! |
Afghanistan Tour, 1999
We arrived in Kabul drunk and early in the morning after a long night of trying to convince local children to set off a gas-station airhose in their butt. After we'd showered the chunks off our clothes, it became apparent that the high-powered explosions had dislodged our penises from our tight-hot-nubile bodies.
Since we were unable to convince the Afghan officials of our manhood, we fell under the same laws as women do. In fact, Tom Vu had his clitorous forcibly removed with a leather punch. But he had a hell of a story to tell!
We ended up playing the local Goat-Curry festival circuit to crowds as big as 13 and many of them with missing legs stayed for our entire set.
Tibet, 2001
The Chinese state department sponsored us to play Tibet. I'm not sure why. At some point in the visit, the Dali Lama showed up claiming he was so high on angel dust, he couldn't feel his own nutsac. Here is a photo of that momentous occasion.
South American Tour, 2003
This is the big Stinkfinger comeback tour of 2003. For various reasons we'd broken up and lived in seperate rooms of our rented house, barely seeing one another. Then one day the phone rang. Shortly afterward, it stopped.
But a few days later, we got a letter, inviting us to play in South America for their annual countrywide Chicken-fight Festival. We packed up our clean pair of socks, broke our collective toothbrush out of retirement and hit the road, never looking back, not even to check to see if the door was locked or if the dog was fed.
We played all over the continent. here's a shot of people that kinda look like we did, if we'd have remembered to bring our instruments.
Rock Da World Tour, 1982
You see, a lot of people don't know that Stinkfinger has been around such a long time. Truth is that we've been a band since the early 1980s, we only just got our instruments a year or two ago.
By the way, this isn't us. This is reminder to use Clearasil daily.
Magic Mushrooms, 2002
This is Jesus. He introduced himself as such and proceded to tell us our future. What makes him different than Jesus was that he was right! All his premonitions have come to pass:
- That stinkfinger would become the biggest band in the whole wide world
- We would cure cancer (he was close. it turns out we *cause* it)
- If you stick a flashlight up your butt, you won't see a glow in your tummy without a Stanley Knife.
Thank you Jesus for all your wisdom!
